Ketamine PTSD and y Kratom sucks ass

Translate fractals Standing next to the bed watching some Japanese anime shit my fiancé put on. N it wasn’t nearly as interesting before I took my nightly dose of ketamine. Iv been snorting 5mg two or three times over the last hour of the day. In California they’ve been making major headway in PTSD treatment with ketamine over the past year or so. I suffer from prolonged post traumatic stress disorder, the difference from standard PTSD being that instead of one traumatic event I spent years in traumatic life threatening and inhuman conditions. it wasn’t cool to bust parents for child abuse until I was a teenager so iv supressed the first ten years of my life and relive the experiences and gain new memories every night in my sleep. Ketamine is a disassociative so enables me to be more of a spectator in my flashbacks rather than an unwilling actor. 

I am a drug user/addict on multiple levels but I never really liked ketamine until recently and I don’t enjoy k holes at all. I know to stop when a warm tingle hits my spine. A little too much and your virtually incapacitated starring at the fractals the light on the other side of your eyelids provides which your mind translates for u like the white noise effect. Ketamine I wouldn’t consider a recreational drug although many of my peers would disagree with me. But it really does help my flashbacks more than anything iv found yet. Kratom effects my PTSD the worst this is virtually a caution label. Native American tribes used Kratom to recall past lives really they were digging deep into their earliest memories, you can see already where this is going. I wake up unsure if everything how old I am etc and Kratom not only caused it but prolonged my confused state upon waking up so there was chaos for hours. 

Symbiosis 

Means shit to tip your hat, to a generation paid in raspberry beret’s. Hope burried even deeper than decaying carcasses of our heroes. When free means only paying taxes. When you can’t afford to be neutral on a moving train but are amyway. K hole through time back to the way it was. I used to loath the world for not understanding and for all the struggles I faced that others didn’t. Only to realize that’s what made me who I am and that you can’t grow without struggle. I face my PTSD every night by my days are spent with the love of my life building a family and a future for all involved. Tao